Short on time

[valancy_jane]

Unfortunately, most days go like this:

- Baby wakes. Breastfast for her. It's 5amish.
- Get to work by 6.
- Work until 5, 530.
- Make dinner until 6, sometimes 630. (Takes full hour or more as many baby interruptions. Fussy time starts around 5.)
- Eat dinner until 6:45.
- Get baby ready for bed/nurse to sleep 6:45-7:30/8.
- Clean up house, dinner 730-830.
- 30 minutes to self, then bed.

In this 30 minutes, sometimes hour if I'm wild and stay up late, I try to writeeditreadcleanorganizeplan. Then I brush my teeth and wash my face and go to bed and start over.

Sometimes I get stuff done by simply staying up until midnight and working on virtually no sleep. But that's rare. I like sleep. Mostly I just wait for the weekend, where I might get 2 hours a day to myself when she naps.

I'd like to write interesting things, but as you can see, pretty much every spare bit of time and talent I have is spent elsewhere at the moment.

I'll be back when I can be.

Comments

[rinue]

Just wanted to reassure you that this is normal because she is still only 4 months old. She feels like she has been around forever and you're lagging way behind and things should be stable by now, but actually it hasn't been very long, and it will be much easier in another few months when she will need to eat less often (particularly as you can introduce solid foods) and will be less fussy (because she'll be more able to self-soothe and more able to do simple things like sit up by herself instead of having to ask you to help).

I know some people are afraid that "oh no once the baby starts walking, it's over!" but actually once they're entertaining themselves and wearing themselves out it requires less attention (in that you have to follow them around, but can be carrying a notebook).

Really, don't worry about it too much. I mean, yeah, don't lose your sense of self, but don't panic and think that this is forever and things have to get done now if they're ever going to. Think of it like vacation or having a broken computer; hard to work, or temporarily unimportant to work, but doesn't mean you're a loser who will never amount to anything.

And for another bit of perspective, I know tons of people who have loads of free time and still don't do two hours of creative or interesting stuff a week.

[valancy_jane]

I'm ok. Really. I have bad times, but mostly I just meant to say - placeholder, good lord, I have no time. Or rather, I do -30 minutes on workdays, about 2 hours on days off - but there's just a lot of competing needs for that time. This evening was good. Had some caffeine and managed to have a little time with C. Much needed. :) Even got a few things done around the house.

[valancy_jane]

Also: should have this bronzed.

Just wanted to reassure you that this is normal because she is still only 4 months old. She feels like she has been around forever and you're lagging way behind and things should be stable by now, but actually it hasn't been very long,

[minim_calibre]

You're doing Important Things! Also, this part will ease up in a few months. Then she'll learn to suck your time in other ways.

[valancy_jane]

LOL so true. I do look forward to it being a bit easier. She draaaags out that night nursing lately. Cries awfully every time I try to put her down and I see those me-time minutes just ticking away. Wah!

[knaveofstaves]

Speaking from far more personal experience than I care to dwell on: Be careful not to over do the skimming free time from your sleep time thing. Even if you make sure to get extra sleep on days you don't work, your body will eventually rebel and you'll basically pass out for like 24 hours. At least, that's what's happened to me before.

[rinue]

I have honestly never even been able to experiment with the whole "cut back on sleep" thing. Not because I sleep through alarms or anything, but because when I'm sleepy I am not functional in even a small way, and all my conversations go "I'm tired!" and all my writing is "meh meh meh I'm not writing this."

[valancy_jane]

I rarely do, and I don't miss out on too much sleep - I still get 5 or 6 hours. About once every week or two I'll stay up until midnight or 1 and be able tog et a few things done - email, time with C - and it keeps me going. Morale do be critical.

[rinue]

So true about morale! Not trying to backseat drive on the sleep; just noting that I myself have never really been able to employ this strategy. I would sometimes stay up all night in college to get something finished for a morning deadline or exam, but afterward I would have to go to bed and sleep for like 8 hours, wake up and eat dinner, and then go back to sleep for another 9 hours.

[valancy_jane]

Oh, no worries. I just feel badly that I've overworried folks!

Really, things are a lot better. It's just hard because we donl't get a break-nonstop treadmill-no day off together, and to-do's are massively piling up. We're reaching out for help (a little childcare so we can both work Fridays and have Sunday off together, housekeeper visit maybe once in a while) and we can't bloody get anyone to answer our emails. We're talking 20 prospective inquiries and NADA.

So...not much left of me/us to go around.

Frantically catching up on email/to-do's now as she's freakishly slept in!!! I'm usually grateful if she makes it to 7am and it's nearly 9!

[valancy_jane]

Oh, I really don't do it often. Like, twice a month. That's the problem - I do prioritize sleep, so...pretty much no time for me. And that's ok. I don't mean to be doom and gloom. Just a heads up that I'm sort of without time to do anything but family and squeeze in a little writing in between grocery lists.