Progress

[valancy_jane]

I am a parent. I sometimes think this should be more astonishing than it is; in general, it seems very normal and part of the flow of things, and I occasionally forget to mention it when I speak to an old friend, as if she has always been there, and it is everyone else that is new.

What is new is my tremendous lack of time. Again, it seems rather normal; I am also not worried as I know it will get easier. But I do find myself flailing rather like a wounded octopus every single time I have a few spare minutes; it is impossible to do laundry, write, clean the kitchen, catch up on email, write email, write a journal entry, make dinner, play video games, read, and spend time with family simultaneously, but I do sometimes attempt it. Occasionally I find myself literally panting with anxiety as I try to figure out what to do because I have a full ten minutes free. Time off is more unnerving, in some ways, than time not off.

Still: things are good. I just do wish I could back to a few unparentish thoughts, as I begin to wonder when I will ever have a little free time and brain for something besides diapers.

Comments

[rinue]

When I am terribly busy, I find it helpful to keep a running list of things I want to do - and this is the key part - broken up into groups of how long those things would take, and then organized so the most pressing things are at the top of each sub-list. Because when I have an unexpected free 15 minutes, the last thing I need is the stress of spending 10 minutes deciding what to do.

I am usually wrong about how long things take, though. It's usually longer than that. But it's a start.

I also forgive myself for just zoning out in front of the internet, as long as it's not EVERY time.

[valancy_jane]

I am keeping a list, but they're all too BIG - the items on the list - to do in a short time frame. I need to add al ist of small things as you suggest; it would help.

One thing that also did help - I went to the library and grabbed some books I'd been meaning to read. 5 minutes of Carrie here and there somehow seems liek I'm accomplishing something, even if it's just reading a book I'd been wanting to read for ages (Also picked up: Oxbow Incident; Thinner [read a paragraph when young and it always stuck with me; have meant to actually read it for years]; latest Nevada Barr mystery. (The Anna Pigeon ranger books.)

[rinue]

Ooooh, yeah - I need to pick up Thinner myself.